Foreign Mayonnaise: On Getting Lost, Slightly Scammed, and Changed by Travel
A poem and reflection on travel without a shared language—or a plan
Foreign Mayonnaise
We tried to find the best tacos in Bangkok.
Had the big golden Buddha to ourselves one
exquisite morning. We were the only farangs,
which means guayaba.
Except for that one girl we saw with a camera
around her neck.
We took the “carcacha” boat
by accident down the river.
Ate popcorn while we watched
a Thai man argue with his mother over
who should drive the boat. Mostly, she seemed
to say he was doing it all wrong.
Had a drop of radioactive river water drip onto my tongue
when I let my guard down for a moment—
because it appeared as if two mighty boats
were about to crash into ours.
Not realizing in the moment, but
looking back on it now that we were
completely getting scammed.
At least they were light-hearted about it,
funny even, but I should’ve known better.
Isn’t this what worthy travel
sandwiches are made off?
They get messy, when you add a big
glob of lost-in-translation
flavored mayonnaise.
© 2026 Carla Monroy
Part of the 100-Day Poetry Project
Travel Isn’t Pretty—and That’s the Education
The famous quote “To travel is to live…” was first expressed by the Danish author and poet, Hans Christian Andersen. I once thought that the freedom to travel was unattainable. I now know that it’s really all about making it happen.
Traveling is the single best way to get a sense for the beauty in humanity. Something we are sadly out of touch with. The proof? In the way negative sentiments about people from other parts of the world are thrown around so carelessly. We learn a lot from observing and experiencing how others live.
I am reminded of the way Anthony Bourdain once described it. He said, “Travel isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always comfortable. Sometimes it hurts, it even breaks your heart. But that’s okay. The journey changes you; it should change you.”
His words point to the lesser-talked-about side of travel. Wherein you don’t speak the language, you are not sure where you are going. You’re not even sure what the other party is saying.
Lost in Translation (and Slightly Scammed)
When you plan improperly, you take the wrong boat. You ask a local for help, but he sees an opportunity to make a few extra bucks. So, he calls his buddy with a makeshift boat to bring it around and take you on a canal tour instead of pointing you in the right direction. He meant no harm, he just couldn’t resist the opportunity to make a little extra.
We stared longingly that day at the boats that passed us. The boats that WE were supposed to be on. Instead, we were floating on one that felt like it could capsize at any moment. With a motor that broke down every five minutes and had to be restarted with a quick pull of a coil.
It was the kind of moment where anger would have been the easy choice. Instead, I looked at my surroundings only to find myself face-to-face with the edge of the big Buddha’s toes as it sat mightily atop the jagged dusty edges of Bangkok city. An “instagrammable” moment we couldn’t pass up.
The Thrill of an Adventure
It is crazy travel encounters that become the best stories to tell at parties. The memories and the photos we took that day now serving as the mementos—the proof that it happened. A reminder that you should never stop search for the next adventure.
What kind of travel mishaps have you gotten into? What would you write when prompted with the thrill of an adventure? Share in the comments below and forward this to someone who would appreciate it.
